Soul Notes from Mark

Giving Beyond the Shadows

Dec 07, 2025

GIVE.

Hang in with me for a sec…

One of my shadow voices showed up in a lucid dream this week. At first, I didn’t know which one. It appeared as a dark spot to my right, right after something big—also part of the dream—had just clicked into place.

That click—and the sudden arrival of the shadow—woke me from that very deep, very real dream. As I surfaced, I felt a presence in the house, even hovering near the bed.

It was a decent hour—4:30 AM—so I got up for coffee, and besides, Sophie never minded an early breakfast nor a couch cuddle. When I finally sat to meditate, the question was still pressing: Who was that shadow?

Too real to ignore, I asked my higher self, “So, who made their old presence known?”

The reply landed immediately, unvarnished.

“Who am I to do this work?”

Ahh. That old shriveled-up bit of news.

And then came another click—this time metaphorical.

As I’ve written recently in MPC (MANY PATHS Connected), I’ve been steeped for weeks in retreat and assessment mode while also looking toward 2026 for my work inside Mark of the Soul. Part of my process seems to be tying myself up in a bunch of knots, pulling the ropes tighter, until I hit the point of I just want to give up.

For comparison, here’s a poor analogy—the twists and turns of a Rubik’s cube eventually reveal how to get all sides to a single color. But I always give up because I can’t figure out how to do it—and honestly, I get bored. It doesn’t matter to me if I never solve the puzzle. Nothing in my soul hinges on those colored squares lining up.

But walking away from my spiritual work? Again?

That would matter. A lot.

And I was on the verge of doing just that. The unexpectedly long stretch of retreat had left me frustrated, confused, fatigued, and feeling useless—a whole choir of dissonant shadow voices. And beneath them all, the big boy: not enough.

silhouette of man standing near wall on dark area — Photo by Marco Bianchetti on Unsplash

Lingering Shadow

Here we go…

“Who am I to_________?”

Create art.
Play music.
Play with Barbie.
Go to music school.
Have a normal relationship.
Build a well-paying career.
Live in France.
Teach. Guide. Channel.
Coach. Mentor. Facilitate.
Love. Share. Be.

The list spirals, leading nowhere. Just like my Rubik’s cube. Except that blank has caused real damage to my trust…in my own capacity and power.

So in meditation, I chose to engage with this surprise visitor.

I acknowledged the shadow.
I asked about its message.
I invited it to sit with me.
I named the harm it caused—and the ways I’d let it stop me.

Then, in stillness, I thanked that dark voice for its service to my karmic lessons, and I told it it was no longer welcome. I affirmed that it is my divine birthright to be and do anything that resonates—and that not even its sinister ambush could derail my purpose now.

I said goodbye and released it to the light.

Back to the main theme: GIVE.

I’m keeping that pesky shadow in the light by rephrasing its old negative energy.

Who am I to give_________?

Light.
Love.
Joy.
Compassion.
A channeled message or soul talk.
Guidance. Wisdom. Experience.
Attention to my evolving soul—or to yours.
Meaning, purpose and delight—to myself and to others.
A glimpse into other realms.
A word, a thought, a hand of service.
All of it, despite the shadows.

Who am I to give my presence?

Who am I?

I am.

It really isn’t more complicated.

Had I given up before pushing the rope back through, loosening the big knot, I would have missed the golden threads at its core—clarity, simplicity, receiving, giving, new ideas, new energy. I’m still in the chrysalis, but the wings are taking shape. It’s the beginning of metamorphosis, when answers come where none were before.

Each of us has many things—and many aspects of ourselves—to give. While this is a season of giving, let the season become a lifetime of offering the highest and best of yourself…your truest, most authentic, most creative self.

Remember your purpose and scatter it far and wide, across Mother Earth and into the Cosmos.

Give your presence to all who enter your field.

Give yourself back to yourself.

Ground Your Truths

My friend, Marley Banker, has a workshop on January 10, 2026—Ground Your Truths.

Participants will explore how to connect with their core inner truths and bring deeper alignment into their lives. It’s ideal for anyone wanting to begin the new year feeling stronger and more attuned to who they really are.

It’s offered in-person at blosm studio in Wedgwood (Northwest Seattle). Learn more below—and consider registering. You’ll be glad you did.

Beginning now and into next year, consider welcoming and facing your shadows. Learn from them. Understand your part in the story. Thank them for their service, and let them know they no longer serve you. Release your shadow thoughts, voices, actions, and energies into the light. Send them on their way—with love.

Then, offer compassion to yourself…for your bravery.